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Home Funny He looks as though he’s been weaned on a pickle.

He looks as though he’s been weaned on a pickle.

, March 4, 2016

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-Alice Roosevelt Longworth

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I never liked you, and I always will.

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I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

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I don’t have to look up my family tree, because I know that I’m the sap.

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Night comes to the desert all at once, as if someone turned off the light. My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?

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There’s nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you’re insightful about it.

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In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

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Christopher Columbus, as everyone knows, is honored by posterity because he was the last to discover America.

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How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.

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