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Home Funny He looks as though he’s been weaned on a pickle.

He looks as though he’s been weaned on a pickle.

, March 4, 2016

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-Alice Roosevelt Longworth

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I never liked you, and I always will.

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I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

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I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.

There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Be obscure clearly.

Be obscure clearly.

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.

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