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Home Funny I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.

I love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.

, March 3, 2016

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-Bob Hope

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As for our majority… one is enough.

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I saw a stationery store move.

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I don’t know. I think it’s funny! I think it’s funny! I go, what? It’s so absurd. I’m alone.

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Here is my prescription to heal all wounds. Watch the film ‘Funny Girl’ at least five times, eat at least 45 chocolate bars, and hang out with all those friends you blew off to hang out with your ex. I truly believe that, through a combination of Nutella, old pals and Barbra Streisand, we can achieve happiness and, very probably, world peace.

Here is my prescription to heal all wounds. Watch the film ‘Funny Girl’ at least five times, eat at least 45 chocolate bars, and hang out with all those friends you blew off to hang out with your ex. I truly believe that, through a combination of Nutella, old pals and Barbra Streisand, we can achieve happiness and, very probably, world peace.

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.

How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.

You know the funny thing, I don’t get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than i get along with the rich people.

You know the funny thing, I don’t get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than i get along with the rich people.

Love is like a faucet, it turns off and on.

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