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Home Funny I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

, March 3, 2016

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-Rodney Dangerfield

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The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

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An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.

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I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one.

I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one.

There’s nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you’re insightful about it.

There’s nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you’re insightful about it.

That’s my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

That’s my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

I was lucky. My family is wonderful. And it’s funny, because most of my best friends come from very large families. So it always felt as if I had lots of siblings, though in the end I had to leave them and go home. I kind of got the best of both worlds as a kid.

I was lucky. My family is wonderful. And it’s funny, because most of my best friends come from very large families. So it always felt as if I had lots of siblings, though in the end I had to leave them and go home. I kind of got the best of both worlds as a kid.

If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

What’s another word for Thesaurus?

What’s another word for Thesaurus?

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