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Home Funny Never have more children than you have car windows.

Never have more children than you have car windows.

, March 3, 2016

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-Erma Bombeck

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So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

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One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts.

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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

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Night comes to the desert all at once, as if someone turned off the light. My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?

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Every man’s dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands.

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I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one.

I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one.

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