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Home Funny I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

, March 3, 2016

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-David Lee Roth

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I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that’s 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says ‘go outside.’

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Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine.

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One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts.

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Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

When humor can be made to alternate with melancholy, one has a success, but when the same things are funny and melancholic at the same time, it’s just wonderful.

When humor can be made to alternate with melancholy, one has a success, but when the same things are funny and melancholic at the same time, it’s just wonderful.

I’m for whatever gets you through the night.

I’m for whatever gets you through the night.

Sixth grade was a big time, in my childhood, of hoops and friendship, and coming up with funny things.

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Someone told me that when they go to Vermont, they feel like they’re home. I’m that way at Saks.

Someone told me that when they go to Vermont, they feel like they’re home. I’m that way at Saks.

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