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Home Funny If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.

If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.

, March 3, 2016

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-Clint Eastwood

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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

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I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

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I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Before I met my husband, I’d never fallen in love. I’d stepped in it a few times.

Before I met my husband, I’d never fallen in love. I’d stepped in it a few times.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

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