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Home Funny I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

, March 3, 2016

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-Rodney Dangerfield

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If it weren’t for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we’d still be eating frozen radio dinners.

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If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.

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To label me an intellectual is a misunderstanding of what that is.

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I awake with a not entirely sickened knowledge that I am merely young again and in a funny way at peace, an observer who is aware of time’s chariot, aware that some metamorphosis has occurred.

I awake with a not entirely sickened knowledge that I am merely young again and in a funny way at peace, an observer who is aware of time’s chariot, aware that some metamorphosis has occurred.

I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that’s 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says ‘go outside.’

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One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts.

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You know the funny thing, I don’t get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than i get along with the rich people.

You know the funny thing, I don’t get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than i get along with the rich people.

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