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Home Funny You can lead a man to Congress, but you can’t make him think.

You can lead a man to Congress, but you can’t make him think.

, March 3, 2016

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-Milton Berle

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I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.

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Electricity is really just organized lightning.

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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.

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If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.

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Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.

I’ve always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.

I’ve always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

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