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Home Funny I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.

, March 3, 2016

773

-Zsa Zsa Gabor

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Television has brought back murder into the home – where it belongs.

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You can lead a man to Congress, but you can’t make him think.

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In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

It’s not an accident that both my sister and I are writers. Our parents created an accidental Petri dish. My family has great storytellers, and I grew up in a very funny, conversational house and didn’t have television. This small family farm was a bubble world that didn’t have much to do with reality.

It’s not an accident that both my sister and I are writers. Our parents created an accidental Petri dish. My family has great storytellers, and I grew up in a very funny, conversational house and didn’t have television. This small family farm was a bubble world that didn’t have much to do with reality.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

I was lucky. My family is wonderful. And it’s funny, because most of my best friends come from very large families. So it always felt as if I had lots of siblings, though in the end I had to leave them and go home. I kind of got the best of both worlds as a kid.

I was lucky. My family is wonderful. And it’s funny, because most of my best friends come from very large families. So it always felt as if I had lots of siblings, though in the end I had to leave them and go home. I kind of got the best of both worlds as a kid.

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