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Home Amazing It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.

It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.

, March 3, 2016

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-Jerry Seinfeld

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I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

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All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

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I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one.

I was eating in a Chinese restaurant downtown. There was a dish called Mother and Child Reunion. It’s chicken and eggs. And I said, I gotta use that one.

Don’t talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

Don’t talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

Christopher Columbus, as everyone knows, is honored by posterity because he was the last to discover America.

Christopher Columbus, as everyone knows, is honored by posterity because he was the last to discover America.

Every dogma has its day.

Every dogma has its day.

It is to be observed that ‘angling’ is the name given to fishing by people who can’t fish.

It is to be observed that ‘angling’ is the name given to fishing by people who can’t fish.

If man knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they’d never marry.

If man knew how women pass the time when they are alone, they’d never marry.

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